Stories that Matter

Confidence

When You're Just Freaked Out And Maybe It's Okay

Rhino skin. And then some. Because somehow, this all feels a little different. Somehow I feel just a little more vulnerable. Just a little less confident. And rather like a very small player on a huge stage filled with far better actors than I.
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Where We Dwell …

It came down to this. These words. You have a choice. You can stay in this place of despair and despondency, waiting for things that may never happen … or you can move on. Find another place to dwell.  A moment like that, if you’ve ever had one, can be life changing. And once you’ve…
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I Have A Place?

I’m going for the record on starting blog posts with, “So, I haven’t blogged in a while…” And it’s true. I haven’t. Why? Good question. Oh. You want the honest to God truth, huh? Because I haven’t felt like I have anything to say. Nothing you haven’t heard before at least. And let’s face it,…
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You're Headed To Conference And You Just Want to Cry

That’s probably one of my favorite writing-related funnies. It pretty much sums up the entire inner process. My office may not look like that (not every day at least), but my brain sure does. And sometimes it’s too much. It’s too much to sit at the computer and force the words. We shouldn’t have to…
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Change. Again.

February 9, 2019 | 23 Comments

I didn’t pick a word for the year. I don’t know why, really. I guess I didn’t give it much thought. But now I kind of feel the word picked me. Change. Ironically, it was my word for 2015. And I wrote this blog post about it. Just a few months before I would announce…

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Maybe It’s Time

December 27, 2018 | 0 Comments

“You gain strength,courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”  — Eleanor Roosevelt. So we…

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Write, Straight Up

May 7, 2018 | 3 Comments

Not on the rocks. Not with a splash. Maybe a twist, that’d be fun. But don’t water it down. Write what you want to say, write from you heart, and write, for the love of everything, like you mean it. If you don’t mean it, don’t waste your reader’s time, or yours. After 20 something…

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Full Disclosure

April 3, 2017 | 7 Comments

Happy Monday, friends. Not sure why we say that, really, since most folks I know aren’t all that jacked about Mondays. Me included. But hey, maybe it helps the motivation pick up a little speed, who knows. Positive thinking is always a good thing, right? So, April 2017. Which means I have survived the release…

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A Different Perspective

March 9, 2017 | 7 Comments

Welcome to another Throwback Thursday Post! We’re talking about my California anniversary trip that inspired me to write The Memory of You! If you’re just jumping on here, you can read last week’s post here. Today we’re going to to talk about perspective. Meaning, how we view things, the world, our families, friends, co-workers. Sometimes…

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Where Is Your Identity?

August 29, 2016 | 17 Comments

I’ve just returned from a few days in Nashville, where I attended the American Christian Fiction Writers annual conference. I was trying to figure out dates in my head and I think this must be at least the eighth conference I’ve attended, and still, I’ll be honest, it’s the best of times and it’s the…

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Owning It – A Few Thoughts From The Front Lines

August 4, 2016 | 11 Comments

It’s been a crazy few weeks. But this is my current location. And I’m trying to relax. Trying being the operative word. All the excitement and anticipation leading up to the release of The Things We Knew, has simmered down. Now it’s out there, and I’m busy with promoting and working on other projects and…

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Me, Unplugged

June 6, 2016 | 8 Comments

I talk a lot about facing my fears. Um, yeah. I know. That’s our least favorite thing, right? For me, one of my biggest battles is self-image. Because I’m introverted, I tend to keep to myself. I’m not great at talking on the phone (I hate it), and I don’t like to put myself out…

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Flashback Friday – Facing Fear

April 29, 2016 | 2 Comments

I was a scared kid. Scared of being alone, scared of being left/abandoned. I think I was scared of the dark for awhile. Timid, shy and terrified of anything that would have me step out of my comfort zone. I had a lovely visual for this blog, an old photo, but I can’t for the…

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Observations From The Back Row

February 9, 2016 | 6 Comments

Ever been in car, just coasting along and then BAM! A tire blows. You’re forced to pull over. If you’ve got a spare, you can replace the blown tire and get on your way. But if you don’t for some weird reason have a spare or you just have no earthly clue how to change…

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When You're Just Freaked Out And Maybe It's Okay

Okay you guys. I have seriously been swamped.

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Yes, that’s my little baby right there. Final proofs, right there on my laptop. Also a hard copy – pages and pages of it. My book. (Cue SQUEAL!)

So. For anyone that thinks writing a book, getting it published and out into the world is a slam dunk . . . heh. Here’s how it goes down. Or how it went down for me.

Offer of contract. Open champagne. Discuss with agent. While drinking champagne. Emails go back and forth. Final deal offered and accepted. More champagne.

Weeks pass.

You almost forget all that wonderfulness happened until you realize it’s time to send your baby off to your new editor. You do this in fear and trembling. Stronger spirits may be necessary at this point.

More weeks pass. (At which point you’ve deemed yourself the worst writer in the world, they hate me, they’re going to pull the contract . . . and your family begins investigating private clinics within which to stash the nut-job away).

Finally your inbox lights up with that first response from your lovely editor. And it is good.

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I know. This is all seriously just an excuse to drink champagne. Not even kidding.

More weeks pass.

Editorial letter arrives. Return to the stronger stuff. And then, because at some point real work must commence . . . this.

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After much wailing and gnashing of teeth and pulling of hair . . . (okay, remember that time I told you I was a total drama queen?) It wasn’t that bad. Oh. Shoot, in between all that . . . how could I forget . . . THE TITLE! Yes!

You know publishers don’t always go with the title you pick for your book, right? Well. My book went through FIVE titles. Yeah. The first was Reprisal, which was the original. Then we had One Nantucket Summer. Then it was Under A Nantucket Moon. Then Beyond Nantucket Shores. And then, finally, The Things We Knew.  Which is totally the right title for this story. But my poor book probably has major identity issues.

Back to work on the edits. Coffee, coffee, coffee. Sometimes I do wonder why I have trouble sleeping. Then I remember.

And then THIS baby pops up in my inbox!

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It’s a real cover. With my name on it. For a real actual book. So of course, this calls for more . . . well. You know.

Prayer and thanksgiving, people. What did you think I was going to say?

Ahem.

So once the first round edits are done, you’d think that’d be it. No. Next we get into line edits. And then final proofs, which I’ve been working on this week. And lest you think all this takes a ton of time and there’s nothing to sweat over- this all began back in August, with the titling, and then edits in September, and now here we are in February. Which may sound like a ton of time, but this all happens in whirlwinds.

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. . . now, this week, my book has gone out to potential endorsers. Which are basically a whole bunch of people who have won Rita and Christy and Carol Awards . . . about to read my book . . . and you guys, seriously.

So now? Now?

I’m terrified. 

I don’t even know why. I knew this day would come. I also know that in a few months . . . 157 days,07 hour, 7 minutes and 52 seconds, but who’s counting . . . The Things We Knew will be out in the world. My first book with a really big (REALLY BIG) publisher. And anyone will be able to read it. And tell me and the rest of the world exactly what they think about it.

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Rhino skin. And then some. Because somehow, this all feels a little different. Somehow I feel just a little more vulnerable. Just a little less confident. And rather like a very small player on a huge stage filled with far better actors than I.

But you know what?

 

And Jesus loves me. So there’s that.

Yeah, I don’t know. This journey. It’s pretty crazy. But I remember where I was this time last year and I have to smile. Because you never know. You never know what’s coming, good or bad or catastrophic. And you just have to deal. And somehow, with grace and a whole lot of extravagant love and mercy . . . you do. Because the world keeps on turning, whether you want to get off or not. And when the best thing happens, and you’re plopped right down into the place you always wanted to go? Well. It’s not exactly the time to turn tail and run, now is it?

Nope. Much as I’d like to say, oh, you know . . . let’s just forget it. Nobody wants to read that book anyway . . . nope. I’m gonna suck it up and find a little faith and confidence and courage . . . because dang it, this is my moment. My dream. I’ve worked too long and too hard to let a nasty little thing like fear get in the way of enjoying this to the full.

And that’s all I have to say today.

Thank you.

Oh. And feel free to pray. Because while all that sounds good . . . this girl’s still shaking in her boots.

Until next time . . .